It's your lucky day that you stumbled upon my "Bargain Basement". This is your chance to snag a great deal on some super great merchandise. All the quality and funny of our regularly priced wares ... just discounted 'cause we're almost out of stock and we're makin' room for new and equally clever goods. Snatch up these bargains while they last.
Thank you. You're welcome. Bud Crowley, Founder